I had the most delicious breakfast I ever ate! Shiznit people are mostly vegetarians because the planet is mostly plant life. But they have so many more varieties of plant life that it is unbelievable! Sometimes they spice up the meals with tiny insects that add protein. It sounded gross at first, but they sure know how to eat! It is fabulous!I then went for a walk by myself to enjoy the beautiful scenery of this gorgeous planet, Shiznit. It even smells nicer than Earth. And the air is so unbelievably fresh. It actually is fun to breathe! Just to inhale is exuberating and lifted my spirits bringing me into a very enjoyable mood compared to the depression I was feeling during the night alone.
Everything was so beautiful and it was such a delight that I forgot about time and direction. Soon I was lost. Not being familiar with the planet's landscape, it was difficult for me to distinguish landmarks to give me an idea of where I had come from and where I was. I was most certainly lost. Very lost. I began to panic.
It was getting twilight, or dusk. Whatever, it was getting darker and darker and I was getting more and more lost. I found myself deep in a thick jungle that made it even more dark. I went from panic to being terrified. I screamed out for help, but there was no reply, not even an echo.
The thick brush all around me began to shake as if there was something in there. Then there was strange noises, making me realize that there really was something in the thick vegetation of the jungle that had engulfed me. There was a lot of different sounds, indicating that there was a whole lot of somethings in the brush!
I was more than terrified! And I had to do more than piss! I had to shit and had to shit really bad! All that good, delicious food I had eaten had turned to shit! But isn't that just like life? Everything that is good soon passes and turns to shit, just like the food!
11 comments:
Gad, Lammy! You're starting to think like me, and the other curmudgeons. Soon you will be joining the club!
This planet is a veritable gold mine of second-hand materials!
Hal Itosis
Purveyor of Second-Hand Goods
Hey Lammy! Why don't you try eating the foliage? You're a ruminate! You'll find that it has a very relaxing effect.
Just keep in mind that if you 'compost' then the plants will LOVE you for it. With a lot of vegetation and little animal life, well let's just say they probably value certain types of material quite a lot. And not just carbon dioxide (bet there's no global warming crisis on planet Shiznit.) So go ahead. Sh*t! Let it be your gift to the world! Mark your spot. Then wipe on the lush foliage. Why if a plant could swoon, it would.
And what could be hiding in the shadows in a world full of plants anyway? Superweed? Megaflower? The Incredible Husk? An apple tree (as Cyder-man?)
NO! could it be a greater superhero than any of them, especially when you really, really gotta go. FLUSH GORDON! The true porcelin king.
So now you have a choice. Do you feed the plants, or plant the feet?
Go ahead! Get poison ivy on your butt like Cheesemeister did, and then they might write a song about you!
And Deep Thought, are you saying Bush likes certain kind of shitty advice from his advisors?
well, Lammy, be careful. even the wildest tiger turns into helpless kittie while taking a shit!
Lammy, you have this background of shiny white dots on black background, they move, and I put my finger between my face and the screen, and focused on the tip of my finger, and finally I saw the 3 dimension picture, the pulsating craters built of stars.
do you have more backgrounds like this?
You're more clever than I am, Ariel. I tried it but didn't see anything except blinking stars moving back and forth. I have dozens of backgrounds that I grab as I surf. Don't know where that one came from.
There are seven backgrounds for this site and your browser picks one based on a formula that uses the numbers from your clock because computers can't pick a random number.
Count Dracula and I are obsessed with numbers!
That clock thing is way too clever for me. Thinking about the way it works makes my head hurt! I feel rather Lamb Brained now.
Do not worry about your difficulties in Mathematics. I can assure you mine are still greater.
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