Anal Probe

Alien Guy's Father

Lammy met the Alien Guy's Dad and immediately fell in love!

Is Alien Guy the Father of Lambkin?

It was an out of this world experience.

Alien Visitors

While I sat on the porch, some space aliens came by and talked to me. The Alien Guy said that I should take a vacation and get away from it all for a while and go to Shiznit and relax. He said I could clear my mind and get my life in order there. Mr. Spock said that sounded logical.

I Get So Excited

It is fun to get out and meet new people, but I get nervous being in a crowd, especially around famous or strange people. When I get nervous and excited, then I have to go pee a lot!

Time Travel To The Future

The Alien Guy saved me from the sharks in the ocean. He had come to show me his new ufo space ship. It was really nice. Then he landed on the beach to let his white dog, Icy, go out and take a crap, and that is when I looked out. Oh no!

I suddenly realized that Prof. Snewgflo's time machine did work! But it didn't take me back in time as I had wanted, but instead took me into the future!

Our Ship Was Destroyed

The Alien Guy's UFO space rocket ship thing was totally destroyed! It had been blown up before we got to it! Now he can't take me back to Earth from this stupid planet, Shiznit. I am so homesick! I want to go home!

I saw Rev. Jimmy Reptile, in all his naked glory, running from the wrecked ship and praising the lord. We think he did it. He blew up the only way I have of getting back home to Earth! That was a mean thing to do. It was even meaner than what the witch Enditall did to me when she turned my head into a lamb's head!

Why are those guys so mean to me. I haven't done anything bad to them! Why would they hate me so much? Why turn me into a freak with a sheep head and then destroying the only way I have to get back home? Those meanies!

I sat by the wreckage with the Alien Guy and his white dog, Icy, as Weird Al sang and Warren Jeffs kept proposing to me to be his eighty-first wife. We then saw the green headed Prof. Snewgflo coming our way. Maybe he knows another way that I can get back home!

I Will Be Going Home!

Enough of the gibber-jabber! The Alien Guy came and told me that they have his UFO fixed and he was going to take me back to Earth. So I quickly grabbed my stuff and we headed for the airport like place where his ship was. My cousin Dog Face Girl and Mary Jane walked with me to say good-by and give me a send off from this planet Shiznit. I sure will miss them. But I sure will be glad to get back home!

As we walked through town, we passed Prof. Snewgflo who waved and told me not to forget what he told me -- TOO LATE! I had already forgotten all that gobble-gook all those guys said. I just wanted to get home and see Axe Man and visit the Happy wiener!

The Planet Shiznit

Isn't it beautiful? The green planet. Often called the green marble or emerald of the sky. People have marveled about it since the dawn of intelligent life on Earth. Alien Guy laughs pretty hard when I say that.

This is the planet Shiznit! This is where The Alien Guy calls home. And why is it green? Well, the Earth looks blue because it is two thirds water or oceans. Shiznit is green because it is almost all vegetation. It is a veritable salad bowl! It is a truly beautiful and fascinating place. Like the Garden of Eden! I'll have to tell more about it later.

And I have also learned that the Sandwich Head Man named Hashish Henry is in fact the cousin of the Alien Guy! Just like the Dog Face Girl and I are cousins. But it is a little more complicated with us. Ariel's brother did some DNA testing and found that my cousin, Dog Face, and my sister, Lula, have the identical DNA profile! Does that make them identical Cousins or are they the same person?

Dog Face Girl has had many traumatic experiences and severe memory losses over the recent couple years, so she really doesn't know or can't recall anything.

So this is just one of the mysteries I am working on to solve as well as the problem of this curse spell that the witch Enditall put on me causing my head to become a lamb's head.

Met An Old Friend

When I went into the Cosmo Ship, I saw an old friend. It was the Alien Guy from the planet Shiznit! He said he was now re-married to Dog Face Girl and they are happy together. We had a few drinks, then he told the white dog, Icy, to set a course for his home planet so that I could visit with my cousin before he took me back home to Earth.

Alien Guy and Wolfie Together

My cousin, The Dog Face Girl, who has the identical DNA as my sister, Lula, used to be married to the Alien Guy. He became gay after the divorce. Dog Face then was going with Wolfie of the Death Cheese and they planned to get married, but things have really changed. She told me that she saw Wolfie and the Gay Alien Guy at Ugly Grace's, and they were acting "very friendly." More friendly than just buddies. We all are believing that Wolfie has turned gay and is now going with the Alien Guy! Will they get married?

You'll Never Believe It!

This is strange! I mean, wow! I was walking home, or maybe staggering a little, or maybe staggering a whole lot, but anyway, I looked in the window of some house and guess what I saw! I don't usually make it a habbit of peeping in other people's windows, but I just couldn't help it this time. There was Elvis and the Alien Guy. I just wish I could remember what house that was. Or even remember what neighborhood it was.

Dog Face Girl recites Cheesemeister's poem at this link HERE

Girl In A Crop Circle

The dicks investigating the disappearance of my sister, Lula, found this photo and thought it might be Lula in a crop circle waiting to be beamed up by the Alien Guy, but upon closer examination by blowing it up (click on picture to make it bigger) they noticed it was someone else. Notice her shoes.